Adelaide United enjoyed an armchair ride in their Hyundai A-League encounter at Hindmarsh Stadium on August 30, cruising to a 3-0 win over a Wellington Phoenix combination which failed to fulfil the fundamentals one expects of a football team over the course of ninety minutes.

The home team were made to look like world-beaters by a side which lacked passion, hunger, desire, fight and pride in their performance - for Phoenix, read Phonies, a dictionary definition for which reads, "something not genuine; false; a person who deceives, dissembles, is insincere".

Wellington were all of that and more in this match, and one hopes Adelaide's one millionth spectator - they needed 7,052 fans to break that milestone, and 7,832 turned up - will be given a refund by the visitors' philanthropist, Terry Serepisos, so embarrassing was a display which made Wellington's predecessors, the New Zealand Knights, look good by comparison. And that's saying something!!

Adelaide did very much as they pleased in this match - hardly surprising when no-one's challenging you when in possession, and you're not being marked or tackled. That they only scored three goals is a reflection on how little they had to apply themselves to collect as many points from this match, although they could - should - have won by a great deal more.

They first flexed their muscles in the ninth minute, Alemao roaming in off the right flank before linking with Travis Dodd, whose cross resulted in Paul Agostino sending a header flashing past the post.

Six minutes later, United opened the scoring. Alemao and Dodd worked a one-two on the right which saw the overlapping fullback whip in a low cross behind the two strikers. Arriving beyond them, completely unmarked, was Lucas Pantelis, whose unerring finish delighted the locals and set his side en route to a share of first place.

Wellington, shorn of the services of the flu-ridden Shane Smeltz before the match, sought a reply through Troy Hearfield, after he linked with Leilei Gao in the eighteenth minute. But Eugene Galekovic smothered his effort, and was little troubled throughout the remainder of the half - an inswinging Gao corner four minutes before the interval was his only real cause for concern.

Otherwise, Adelaide enjoyed a plethora of possession, so much so that they appeared to run out of ideas re what to do with it at one stage. Dodd decided to remind them of their responsibilities nine minutes before the interval with a twenty-five yard shot on the run which flashed over the bar.

That effort served its purpose, for six minutes later, the impressive Scott Jamieson pinged in a cross which the even more impressively performed Paul Reid guided down into Agostino?s path. His stinging volley flashed across the face of goal, the last act of note in a half in which Wellington had been pathetic.

Coach Ricki Herbert clearly gave his side seven bells during the half-time break, because they emerged showing more fight in the first forty-five seconds of the second spell than they had mustered in the first forty-five minutes of the match!

Indeed, it almost proved beneficial on the scoreboard, as a stray pass from an under-pressure Adelaide player presented Leo Bertos with the chance to let fly from twenty-five yards. Galekovic parried the shot to safety.

Within ninety seconds, the ball was down the other end of the park, and Adelaide were celebrating a second goal. Half-time substitute Robert Cornthwaite rampaged down the right on the overlap, and raced onto Jonas Salley's pass before fizzing in a wicked low cross to the near post.

Cristiano was the recipient of the delivery, and laid the ball back into Reid's path. The midfielder unleashed a fifteen-yard piledriver which Wellington goalkeeper Glen Moss could only parry - straight into the path of Cristiano - 2-0.

That seemed to knock the stuffing out of Wellington, who mustered a twenty-five yarder from Richard Johnson and a twenty-yard free-kick from David Mulligan in response during the next fifteen minutes. Both were comfortably dealt with by Galekovic.

Adelaide, meanwhile, had looked to press home their advantage. In the 57th minute, a delightful internchange between Cristiano, Dodd and Pantelis carved Wellington open with devastating precision. Pantelis, roaming in off the left flank, sent a vicious low cross arrowing across the six-yard box, but no-one in a red shirt was on hand to do it justice.

The locals didn?t have long to wait for the third goal, however. On the hour, Pantelis led the charge out of his half, and instantly switched play to Dodd with an inch-perfect crossfield ball which his captain had time to control and turn upon - twice, if required!

Reid was the next recipient of the ball, and his defence-splitting angled outside-of-the-right-foot pass found Pantelis galloping into the penalty area at a great rate of knots. His low cross into the goalmouth was an invitation to score, and Cristiano was first to take up the offer - 3-0, and no-one was in doubt that, had Adelaide applied themselves, this could easily have been en route to a rout!

To emphasise this, Dodd hit the crossbar with a rasping twenty-five yarder five minutes later, before Cristiano spurned the chance to complete his hat-trick when Galekovic and Dodd combined to send him spearing through Wellington's flimsy back-line. The striker guided his effort over the advancing Moss, but his attempt lacked accuracy.

After another Adelaide attack, led by Cornthwaite, had left Wellington's rearguard at sixes and sevens, a slick move featuring Dodd, Reid and Agostino put Pantelis in on the left once more. With team-mates queuing up to increase the home team's margin of victory, the scorer of the first goal sought further glory, but failed to find it in the side-netting.

Substitute Robert Younis was introduced soon after, and with his first touch, thirteen minutes from time, was denied from making it 4-0 by the outstretched leg of Moss, after Saso Ognenovski and Cristiano combined for the newcomer's benefit thirteen minutes from time.

Another opening soon materialised, this time with the roles reversed. Younis sent Cristiano spearing into the penalty area on the left, and he checked inside before unleashing a curling effort which arced tantalisingly past the far post. It deserved better fate.

Wellington's attempts to grab a late goal, through the long-range efforts of Bertos and Michael Ferrante, sought to add a touch of respectability to the scoreline, but the visitors' performance didn't even merit that on this occasion.

They were dire, much to Adelaide's pleasure, as it meant they could go about winning at will, a feat they achieved with aplomb against opponents who have a fortnight to shed themselves of their new 'Phonies' name-tag and rise like the proverbial Phoenix after which their club is named.